Be emotionally ready to hear "no" in a negotiation
[Management Tip of the Day]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e6f&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Today’s Tip
Be Emotionally Ready to Hear “No” in a Negotiation
Hearing “no” during a negotiation can bring up all sorts of feelings: sadness, rejection, and even anger. How can you prepare for a tough conversation so you don’t react impulsively when those emotions come up? Start by asking yourself: What if the person says no to my request? What if they say they dislike my proposal? What if they're rude or passive-aggressive? As you work through these “what-if” scenarios, also consider: What is my go-to response? Why do I react this way? Do your best to be nonjudgmental as you go through this thought exercise. After all, we all have reactions we’re not proud of at times. Once you’ve identified your unconscious emotional responses, think about how to manage them. Consider: If I feel stuck in the middle of the conversation, what can I do? If I hear a “no,” what are two or three ways to react without feeling frazzled or dejected? This will give you tactics you can turn to in the heat of the moment. Consider rehearsing the conversation with a friend to help you identify your stumbles, get real-time feedback, and hopefully, feel more at ease. Increasing your self-awareness and having alternative approaches at the ready will help you make better choices about what to react to in the moment, what emotions to embrace, and what to let pass if you hear the dreaded "no."
This tip is adapted from “Managing Your Emotions During a Negotiation<https://hbr.org/2021/12/managing-your-emotions-during-a-negotiation?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge,”> by Gaëtan Pellerin
ADVERTISEMENT
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720421&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e8e&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720422&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e8f&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720424&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e90&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/marketing/email/NewsletterPromo_DV_Dec2021.png]<https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
Your smarts. Our charts. <https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
Explore HBR Data & Visuals — a subscriber‑only library of charts and visuals.
Visit HBR Data & Visuals <https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/newsletters/NewWorldWork_EMAIL_NEWSLETTER_PROMO_1200.png]<https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
Newsletter
The New World of Work <https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
Candid conversations on talent, tech, and the future of business. A special email series for subscribers.
Sign up now <https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/marketing/email/TLGOAL_500.png]<https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
Zip file
HBR Tools: Goal Setting <https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
by Dick Grote
$39.95
Learn more <https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
[triangle icon]<https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle>
Don’t forget you’re entitled to 20% off your first purchase*
*Use promo code HBRORGREG4.
View details here.<https://hbr.org/registration-details>
[twitter]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e91>
[facebook]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e92>
[instagram]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e93>
View in browser <https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e94&p1=@8fuYCSgYtvcfjfLs6ubtyo9f70fTY9WCPjsNe-_meZZXVCuQeEfCRxBgqH7jCWVlWvgxIjszwCxFoDxW2efYrqi2rAE_zBaHr14Ad5pEM6-zvYNB>
Contact us<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e95&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Privacy policy<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e96&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Manage newsletter preferences<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e97&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Unsubscribe<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e98&p1=%40t6p7L4VyTOGTCdqZdBCfGpvOsjDPku9z06x_xAqkXoUTyQlBAI1RCPXFUHIlRv-4bd6IUX5VvSkAlDsCcrkcKJEhxVs>
To ensure email delivery, add noreply@a.email.hbr.org<mailto:noreply@a.email.hbr.org> to your address book, contacts, or safe sender list.
Copyright © 2021 Harvard Business School Publishing,
an affiliate of Harvard Business School. All rights reserved.
Harvard Business Publishing
20 Guest St, Suite 700
Brighton, MA 02135
Today’s Tip
Be Emotionally Ready to Hear “No” in a Negotiation
Hearing “no” during a negotiation can bring up all sorts of feelings: sadness, rejection, and even anger. How can you prepare for a tough conversation so you don’t react impulsively when those emotions come up? Start by asking yourself: What if the person says no to my request? What if they say they dislike my proposal? What if they're rude or passive-aggressive? As you work through these “what-if” scenarios, also consider: What is my go-to response? Why do I react this way? Do your best to be nonjudgmental as you go through this thought exercise. After all, we all have reactions we’re not proud of at times. Once you’ve identified your unconscious emotional responses, think about how to manage them. Consider: If I feel stuck in the middle of the conversation, what can I do? If I hear a “no,” what are two or three ways to react without feeling frazzled or dejected? This will give you tactics you can turn to in the heat of the moment. Consider rehearsing the conversation with a friend to help you identify your stumbles, get real-time feedback, and hopefully, feel more at ease. Increasing your self-awareness and having alternative approaches at the ready will help you make better choices about what to react to in the moment, what emotions to embrace, and what to let pass if you hear the dreaded "no."
This tip is adapted from “Managing Your Emotions During a Negotiation<https://hbr.org/2021/12/managing-your-emotions-during-a-negotiation?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge,”> by Gaëtan Pellerin
ADVERTISEMENT
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720421&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e8e&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720422&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e8f&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://sli.hbr.org/imp?s=720424&li=%7bLIST_ID%7d&e=jarrazola@cste.org&p=DM166775]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e90&p1=jarrazola@cste.org&p2=DM166775>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/marketing/email/NewsletterPromo_DV_Dec2021.png]<https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
Your smarts. Our charts. <https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
Explore HBR Data & Visuals — a subscriber‑only library of charts and visuals.
Visit HBR Data & Visuals <https://hbr.org/data-visuals?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&utm_content=signinnudge>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/newsletters/NewWorldWork_EMAIL_NEWSLETTER_PROMO_1200.png]<https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
Newsletter
The New World of Work <https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
Candid conversations on talent, tech, and the future of business. A special email series for subscribers.
Sign up now <https://hbr.org/email-newsletters?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&movetile=newworldofwork>
[https://hbr.org/resources/images/marketing/email/TLGOAL_500.png]<https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
Zip file
HBR Tools: Goal Setting <https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
by Dick Grote
$39.95
Learn more <https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle&sku=TLGOAL-ZIP-ENG>
[triangle icon]<https://store.hbr.org/product/hbr-tools-goal-setting/TLGOAL?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge&utm_term=subben_buyeracq_nsubarticle>
Don’t forget you’re entitled to 20% off your first purchase*
*Use promo code HBRORGREG4.
View details here.<https://hbr.org/registration-details>
[twitter]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e91>
[facebook]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e92>
[instagram]<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e93>
View in browser <https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e94&p1=@8fuYCSgYtvcfjfLs6ubtyo9f70fTY9WCPjsNe-_meZZXVCuQeEfCRxBgqH7jCWVlWvgxIjszwCxFoDxW2efYrqi2rAE_zBaHr14Ad5pEM6-zvYNB>
Contact us<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e95&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Privacy policy<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e96&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Manage newsletter preferences<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e97&p1=?utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter_daily&utm_campaign=mtod_actsubs&utm_content=signinnudge>
Unsubscribe<https://t.a.email.hbr.org/r/?id=h980eb0b1,121a7e6d,121a7e98&p1=%40t6p7L4VyTOGTCdqZdBCfGpvOsjDPku9z06x_xAqkXoUTyQlBAI1RCPXFUHIlRv-4bd6IUX5VvSkAlDsCcrkcKJEhxVs>
To ensure email delivery, add noreply@a.email.hbr.org<mailto:noreply@a.email.hbr.org> to your address book, contacts, or safe sender list.
Copyright © 2021 Harvard Business School Publishing,
an affiliate of Harvard Business School. All rights reserved.
Harvard Business Publishing
20 Guest St, Suite 700
Brighton, MA 02135